This season has been rough. It's been rough for me, and it's been rough for the rest of the world to a greater extreme. I went back to school full time in January, while continuing to homeschool, and maintaining my writing duties and I had this great idea that I'd hire a babysitter when I needed help. This would have been the first time in years using a sitter and it was a big step for me to admit I needed help, but the Coronavirus had other plans...
Instead, I've been left juggling my kids education, my own education, and maintaining my deadlines. To say I feel burned out and like I'm failing everything right now would be an understatement.
Recently, I've been feeling God press my heart in the direction of maintaining a "Mary heart" in a Martha world. I'm sure you're familiar with the story. Luke records:
As Jesus and his disciples were on their way, he came to a village where a woman named Martha opened her home to him. She had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet listening to what he said. But Martha was distracted by all the preparations that had to be made. She came to him and asked, “Lord, don’t you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself? Tell her to help me!”
I stay up late each night reading and studying for school, and I wakde up early each morning to do the same thing, but in my incessant demand to study theology and read about Jesus, I've neglected the simple act of spending time with him.
In the business of trying to stay afloat with the demands laid upon mothers in this time, it's so important to increase our time with Jesus, not decrees it. From Him, our wellspring of life flows, and without that sacred time, emptiness ensues! If these last months have taught me anything, it's simply that the business is non-essential, but the stillness is lifegiving!
How have you maintained your oil filled during the pandemic? What Scripture motivates you?
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is a writer & tired homeschooling mom of five.